Tag: wellness coach

All Emotions are Valid and That Doesn’t Mean They Should Dictate Your Actions

All Emotions are Valid and That Doesn’t Mean They Should Dictate Your Actions

There are no wrong emotions, they all are valid. We cannot control how we feel about circumstances or events. Your truth is your truth. The initial feelings you have in response to events are always okay.
What you can control is how you choose to react and respond even when emotions are heightened. Just because your feelings and emotions are valid, doesn’t mean they give you an excuse to behave however you want. It’s important to keep in mind that your initial emotions do not consider many factors you’d prefer to consider when thinking with a rational mind and not one overcome with strong feelings. Your emotions do not consider your goals, the relationships you’d like to keep, or the work you’ve put in thus far.

What’s the Negativity Bias and How Do We Work with It?

What’s the Negativity Bias and How Do We Work with It?

In our world, for those of us who are fortunate enough to have our basic needs met, the constant negativity bias is no longer necessary for survival. The negativity bias, which was once an adaptive advantage, can therefore become maladaptive. So much so that a negative event can be detrimental to our work, relationships, health and happiness. Continually viewing things through the lens of the negativity bias can increase stress levels, impair our happiness and general quality of life. It also makes it harder to be patient and giving towards others.
Fortunately, there is a way to change the brain’s negativity bias. First, bring awareness to the fact that “bad” comes through stronger than “good.” Then, it’s a matter of training our brains for positivity. Actively become more attuned to positive emotions such as joy, contentment, pride, and love. Studies claim that for a positive experience to get into our long-term memory we should hold it in our field of attention for at least 10-20 seconds or it could disappear. This helps with sensitizing the amygdala to focus more on the good.

How to Fill Your Self-Care Cup Even with a Busy Schedule

How to Fill Your Self-Care Cup Even with a Busy Schedule

A strong and intentional morning routine is the key to a great day. It’s great to make your morning routine a priority, but the truth is we don’t always have hours to dedicate to it. Sometimes we sleep in, sometimes we have somewhere to be earlier than usual, sometimes we simply don’t have the time. There are a million different reasons. What will set you up for a great day, even when you don’t have much time to devote to yourself, is having a set of non-negotiables. These non-negotiables are activities that you know will help you have the best day that you can.

Before you open yourself up to the outside world and influence, do something for your mind, your body, and your soul. Develop quick practices you can do in each category as your non-negotiables. What exactly you do to fulfil these requirements may differ day to day. Taking care of your body might be a walk, a strength class, Pilates, or a stretch. An activity for your mind may be reading a few pages in your book, a passage of the daily stoic, a crossword puzzle, or listening to a podcast. Something for your soul may be meditating, getting out in nature, playing with your pets, prayer, watching the sunrise, or a gratitude practice.

Starting your morning with an activity for your mind, body, and soul will set you up to have an amazing day. If you’re pressed for time in the morning, or have obligations extremely early, extend yourself grace and do something in each of these three categories at some point during the day. Stay away from an all or nothing mentality. A 5 min stretch before bed is better than no movement at all. Reading a page in a book is better than not reading at all. Are challenging 45 minute workouts great? Sure. Is learning a new skill beneficial? Yes, but you don’t have to do activities that take a lot of time and effort every day. You can achieve the results you desire with consistent small steps.

Use a system of trial and error to find out what helps you feel your best. Your non-negotiables may look different and may change during different times in your life. I encourage you to have a morning routine and a couple non-negotiable activities that you can do no matter how much time you have or what your day looks like. Have an extensive morning routine to foster the relationship you have with yourself when you have time. Curate a few quick and easy non-negotiable practices to fill up your self-care cup when you have to hit the ground running. This will set you up for a great day no matter what you have on the agenda

Want help curating a morning routine and a practice of non-negotiables? Learn more about 1:1 coaching and contact me to sign up for your first session here.

 

 

Be Purposefully Happy

Be Purposefully Happy

Sometimes happiness hits you, but most of the time it’s a choice you make. It’s something you have to purposefully create not happen upon. Becoming aware of this and intentionally creating happiness in the normalcy is where sustainable happiness lies.

Don’t live a life governed by your emotions

Don’t live a life governed by your emotions

“We cannot live being governed by how we feel. Our emotions are temporary and not always reflective of reality.” –Brianna Wiest in her book the: The Mountain is You. We’ve all been there. We feel strong emotions and want to react. But is that always 

How to Create a Bad Mood Tool Box

How to Create a Bad Mood Tool Box

We’re all intimately familiar with what it’s like to be in a bad mood. Sometimes there is a reason for it, other times you simply wake up on the wrong side of the bed. There are times bad moods need to be felt. Where you need to take a day to take it easy or process the reasoning behind your mood. There are other times you recognize you’re in a bad mood, you recognize that you don’t want to be in one but you can’t get out of it. The bad mood becomes a dense cloud you want to navigate out of, but every turn is met with fog.

Just as pilots plot their routes before take-off and have a GPS to help them navigate if the weather turns, you too can plot a way out of your bad mood before it happens. Create a bad mood tool box that contains a list of things you can run through to help you navigate your way out of the bad mood cloud and back to enjoying life. This bad mood tool box will be your guide back to inner peace.

What you add to your tool box is up to you. It takes trial and error to see what will work. When you find something you enjoy, or that elevates you, add it to your bad mood list. This way, when you’re in the middle of the bad mood cloud you don’t have to spend energy thinking through what will help you. You can simply run through your pre-created list. If you have negative coping habits, you can place the list somewhere near those things so when you’re tempted to turn to them, you have other options. Here are some tools that many of my clients have found to be helpful:

  1. A walk. Take a walk out in nature. Notice the weather, the plants, the animals you see as you walk. Put your phone away and breathe the fresh air. Nature is healing.
  2. Ground Yourself. Put your bare feet on the ground. Feel the grass, the snow, the rain, or the warmth under your feet. Reconnect with the earth.
  3. A Podcast. Listen to a podcast. It can be an inspirational one or simply one you find interesting. Immerse yourself in what is being talked about. This break from your own thoughts can be just want you need to help elevate you out of the bad mood. Some of my favorite podcasts are the Skinny Confidential His & Her podcast, Glennon Doyle’s podcast: We Can Do Hard Things, Gabby Bernstein’s podcast: Dear Gabby, and the Rachel Hollis podcast.
  4. A Videogame. Play your favorite video game! This is another great tool that can give you a break from your thoughts. This break can be just what you need to regroup and break the bad mood.
  5. Change of Scenery: Changing your scenery or your daily routine can help you switch your perspective. Removing yourself from your day to day routine helps you realize that there are bigger things at work and the universe doesn’t center around you and your problems. Reaffirming that life goes on and the world keeps spinning, even when it all seems to be crumbing down, can be comforting when it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders.
  6. Create a Good Things Photo Album: Create a photo album in your phone with all the things you encounter that bring you joy. When a bad moods arises pull it out and look at all the things in your life that you love. Learn more about a good things photo album here. 
  7. Hydrate. When everything seems complicated, impossible, and horrible, ask yourself how much water you’ve had that day. Sometimes it just as simple as you’re not able to deal with the hard thing’s life is throwing at you because the only thing you’ve had to drink all day is iced coffee. Water is key, it might not be that simple, but sometimes it is.
  8. Nutrition: When was the last time you had a fruit, vegetable, and protein? It’s unfair to ask our bodies and minds to perform at 100% when we aren’t feeding them the nutrients they need to thrive. When you feed your body a wide variety of nutrient dense foods it will have the fuel it needs to perform at its best. Your body will let you know when it isn’t getting what it needs, sometimes that manifests in a bad mood.
  9. Meditation. Meditation is great for so many things. It reconnects you with yourself, your true self without all the outside noise. It’s also a practice of taking control of your thoughts. Having control over your thoughts is game changing.
  10. Gratitude Practice. Where you place your focus is the reality you create. If you are focusing on everything going wrong, your reality is that everything is wrong. If you place your focus on the things going right, your reality is that everything is right. By consistently engaging in a gratitude practice, you can train your brain to focus on the positives. This is a game changer for increasing your satisfaction and enjoyment with life.

You may get to the bottom of your list and find you’re still in the bad mood cloud. If nothing works—do nothing. Sometimes the only thing you can do is hunker down and wait for the fog to lift. Sleep it off, and find comfort in the fact that nothing lasts forever, the storm will lift and you can make it through. Brené Brown is an American Researcher who studies human emotions. In her talks, she speaks of overwhelm. Bad moods can sometimes build to the level of becoming overwhelming. When it seems like nothing is going right, you cannot communicate with others or yourself the way you usually would, or if tasks that are normally doable become unmanageable, it’s a sign your bad mood is transforming into overwhelm. Overwhelm transcends the feelings of being stressed or annoyed. Overwhelm means you cannot process the events in your life at the speed they are happening. Your internal systems are overloaded. When this happens, Brown confirms the best thing to do is nothing. Don’t drive, don’t make important decisions, don’t work, don’t cook dinner, or clean. Your nervous system needs time to calm down. When in an overwhelming bad mood, the best thing to do is hunker down, breathe, and wait for the clouds to pass. If you find your mood lasting for days and greatly interfering in your quality of life, it may be beneficial to seek professional help. Therapy and coaching are life changing. Always remember, you’ve got this.

A gentle reminder to focus on the good

A gentle reminder to focus on the good

It’s a great day to focus on all the things going right in your life ☀️ Your mind likes to draw your focus to what’s wrong/to do lists/what’s missing but you can change this. Focus on the good. Ruminate on the good. Think about everything 

Rock and a hard place

Rock and a hard place

Do you feel like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place? Is something causing you frustration and you don’t know what to do about it? Have you searched and thought but still can’t find the right answer? If you thought through every angle, 

How to Make Homemade Cavatelli

How to Make Homemade Cavatelli

Some people show their love with gifts or words of affirmation, I show it with homemade pasta. I got this recipe from the blog The Clean Eating Couple. The owner of the website has tons of great recipes, you should definitely check it out-i’ll link her blog post here. The only thing I changed from Liz’s recipe is I like to use half white flour and half whole wheat. Either way, it’s delicious! Cavatelli is the perfect place to start if you want to make homemade pasta. You don’t need any fancy machinery, just a simple pasta board you can get for $9.00 on Amazon. This would be a great recipe to make with your family if you’re looking for fun things to do together! Enjoy!

Ingredients:

  • 1 lb whole milk ricotta
  • 2 cups white flour
  • 2 cups whole wheat flour
  • ½ tbsp salt
  • 2/3 cup water
  • A cavatelli pasta board (8$ on amazon, i’ll link the one I use here

Directions:

  • Mix all ingredients together in a bowl. At first the dough will be sticky but work the dough squeezing it together for about 2 minutes.
  • After the dough is formed into a ball, turn the dough onto a floured surface and knead for another 1-2 minutes. This helps the dough to become smoother.
  • Set dough aside and add more flour to your surface.
  • Take about 2 tbsps. of dough and roll into a thin strip, about ½ inch thick.
  • Using a scissor or knife, cut the strips into small balls (smaller than a dime).
  • Toss the balls with flour and then use the pasta tool to shape balls into cavatelli shapes. Form the shapes by pressing and rolling the balls down onto the pasta shaper.
  • Place the cavatelli on a floured baking sheet as you’re making them-shaking the sheet every few minutes to make sure they’re not sticking to one another.
  • Put the cavatelli on the baking sheet in the freezer for 1 hour.
  • When the cavatelli are frozen, pour them into a mesh strainer. Shake the excess flour off of them.
  • Store in a Ziplock bag or container in the freezer until ready to eat.
  • When you’re ready to cook the pasta, boil salted water in a pot. Add cavatelli to boiling water and cook for about 4-5 minutes, or until cavatelli float to the top of the pot.
  • Add sauce of your choosing & enjoy!
How to Make Homemade Cavatelli
How to Make Homemade Cavatelli
How to Make Homemade Cavatelli
How to Make Homemade Cavatelli
How to Make Homemade Cavatelli
How to Make Homemade Cavatelli
How to Make Homemade Cavatelli
How to Make Homemade Cavatelli
What is Your Best?

What is Your Best?

Do your best. We hear this statement often. And what does it mean? Feeling you did your best should enable you to go to sleep at night feeling fulfilled and satisfied with the activities you engaged in that day. Wanting to do your best encourages you to put forth the effort needed to meet your goals. How do you define your best? The answer depends on your individual goals and gets harder to navigate the more you look outside yourself for the meaning.