Thoughts Are Not Facts
Our thoughts can be anxiety provoking, they can run away from us and become seemingly unmanageable. You may think you have no power over your thoughts, but you do. The ability to pick and choose your thoughts is your greatest source of power.
Just because you have a thought doesn’t mean it’s true. And it certainly doesn’t mean you have to believe it. You can choose a different thought. A thought that makes you feel good, one backed by facts. You can let the old thought go back to where it came from, nowhere.
Our thoughts are not objective. They are influenced by our perception which is influenced by our past experiences and conditioned beliefs.
How do you choose different thoughts when it’s so easy to listen to the anxiety producing ones? By rebutting them with facts. When your thoughts try to make you believe one thing, list all the facts that prove it wrong.
For example, your brain may jump to the conclusion that your partner is selfish because they didn’t call to say they’d be home late. This thought system would normally put a damper on your night. But does the one act of your partner not calling really equate to the conclusion you drew? Are there facts that rebut this conclusion? These facts can be that your partner is working late to provide for your family. That isn’t selfish. It can be that your partner took over making dinner yesterday because they saw how tired you were even though they were exhausted from work and it was your turn to make dinner. That isn’t selfish. The fact can be that your partner goes food shopping every week even though they hate it. Not selfish. The fact can be the time they surprised you with flowers because they knew you were having a hard time. Again, not selfish. With each fact that you come up with that rebuts your original thought, you’ll start to think maybe your partner is not selfish. Perhaps they simply got caught up at work and forgot. Instead of attaching meaning to the action, you can simply express your preference to your significant other that they call next time.
Maybe you think you won’t make it through the hardships you’re facing, but look at the facts. You made it through every hardship you faced before.
Maybe you think you’re not good enough, but look how far you have come and look at you still going. Look at how enough you are.
Next time you have an anxiety producing thought, next time you brain is mean to you, next time you find it hard to choose a different thought, see if you can rebut it with facts.
Have trouble choosing a different thought? You’re not alone. It takes practice and conscious effort to break the patterns you’ve grown accustom to. Sign up for coaching here to help you through the initial process until you can consistently do it on your own!